Last week W(my 13 year old) and I were spending some quiet time together in the evening. He often comes and joins me just before bedtime wherever I am reading so we can have a chat at the end of his day. (quiet time without little brother there) We got talking about our move and how we were feeling about it now that a few months had passed. We were talking about how what seemed like such a big, huge difficult thing (leaving our home of 10 years and all that that included) turned out to be...well, just fine. Yes, it was difficult to work through and very emotional but here we are, in a new place, with lots of differences and...we're still fine. In fact, we're just as happy as always.
Then he told me that he figured this life experience was much like his most recent experience mountain biking. He and S had been taking a difficult run and, each week, they would skirt a particularly difficult looking jump. (not the one shown in these photos) This jump was one where you have to take off from the wooden jump but then you can't see the landing from where you are. You just have to jump and trust that you will make it. As he went around it the first few times he would think to himself that it looked quite difficult and he wasn't ready. The next week he would think that maybe he should try that soon. Another time skirting it and he would think that he really should give it a go, it would probably be fine. Each time past it his mind talk would change, get more encouraging, a little more confident as his biking improved. Another time down and he told himself that he could do it and would go ahead and try it. Along, Up, Over....Great Landing! Yes! He did it. Thinks to himself that he should have tried that along time ago. Why was he waiting? It was such fun and he could have been doing it all Summer.
His insight was this: It is hard to take off when you can't see where you are going to land. And he compared this to our move. We were leaving our home and we weren't yet heading to our hoped for acreage...we didn't really know where we would land. He says it makes it scarier to take off when you don't know where or how you will land but he couldn't imagine the alternative - choosing never to take off.
Imagine if we allowed fear to hold us in a place, anyplace...even a good place. If we're letting fear get in the way of living our best life, of taking good risks, of trying new things...well, let's just say that I am so pleased he has learned this lesson already. And this, this time to talk, this time for meaningful conversations, this time for my children to learn and to teach me such important life lessons, this is one of the things I love most about living, loving and learning at home.
It is hard to take off when you can't see where you are going to land.
But...it is ever so worth it, don't you think?
5 comments:
What a wise and courage boy! Also goofy, and I have the pictures to prove it!
You had a tree almost fall on you! I should read your blog more often. Glad you're okay.
What a wonderfully profound insight for a 13 year old. One of the things I loved about homeschooling was watching my children become themselves. Those days are a treasure.
Thank you for your mother-and-son insight and wisdom. What a gift for those of us who get to read it.
Dianne
What a wise boy you have and a lucky one to have a mother to talk to like that.
Thanks for your comments. It is wonderful to be mama to such a wise, insightful boy and I feel very blessed to live in such a way that we have the time and space to sit and have such talks. Very blessed indeed.
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